Understanding the Intersection of Grief and Legal Matters with Stephanie Prestridge
Stephanie Prestridge, a distinguished attorney and life insurance advocate, engages in a profound discourse on the intricate nexus between grief and estate planning. Throughout our conversation, we analyze the often-overlooked challenges individuals face when grappling with the loss of a loved one, particularly in navigating the complexities of life insurance claims. The salient point of our discussion points out the vital role of proactive estate planning and the necessity for individuals to possess a comprehensive understanding of their financial affairs before such painful events occur.
Stephanie eloquently articulates the emotional burdens and legal hurdles that bereaved families encounter, emphasizing that they require compassion and clarity in legal guidance. As we explore these themes, we aim to illuminate the path towards empowerment for those experiencing grief, ensuring they do not face the daunting realities of estate matters alone. A profound exploration of grief and the intricate landscape of estate planning unfolds as lawyer and life insurance advocate Stephanie Prestridge shares her invaluable insights.
The conversation delves into the often-overlooked intersection of grief and the legal complexities that arise when a loved one passes away. With a compassionate approach, Stephanie emphasizes that understanding one's rights and the intricacies of life insurance can empower individuals during their most vulnerable moments. She recounts her personal journey that led her to advocate for those navigating the tumultuous waters of loss and legal obligations, highlighting the necessity of proactive estate planning as a means to alleviate future burdens on grieving families.
The episode serves as both a wake-up call and a guide for listeners to confront the realities of mortality and the importance of preparation, ensuring that loved ones are not left grappling with financial uncertainties during their time of grief.
Takeaways:
- The intricacies of estate planning reveal the profound impact of grief on decision-making during challenging times.
- Understanding the legal landscape surrounding life insurance can empower individuals facing the loss of loved ones.
- It is imperative to proactively establish clear communication regarding financial matters to mitigate stress during grief.
- Navigating the complexities of life insurance claims requires awareness of potential pitfalls and the importance of professional guidance.
Links referenced in this episode:
Companies mentioned in this episode:
- Help Lawyer Network
- Legal Owl
- Life Claim
Transcript
Anything that has to involve a lawyer is, you know, unfortunately, it's slow.
Speaker A:Even though we try to move very quickly and we try to handle everything as quickly as possible, it's slow.
Speaker A:But I always tell people that understanding is power.
Speaker B:You've entered Legal L where sharp legal minds meet the power of Strategic Intuitive intelligence and inner awareness.
Speaker B:Hosted by someone that is a veteran, an author and is an individual experience in specialist security operations.
Speaker B:Strategic Intuitive intelligence and transformational psychology.
Speaker B:This is not your typical legal podcast.
Speaker B:We explore what most lawyers never say out loud.
Speaker B:Burnout, grief, inner dissonance and what it really takes to sustain a legal career with clarity, purpose and personal alignment.
Speaker B:Alongside powerful solo insights.
Speaker B:You'll hear thought provoking conversations with members of the Help Lawyer Network, Lawyers, legal support professionals and expert witnesses sharing real stories from the front lines.
Speaker B:This is the space where law meets what's rarely talked about.
Speaker B:Welcome to Legal owl, where wisdom meets the law and strategic intuitive intelligence guides the way.
Speaker C:Well, good afternoon or good evening or even good morning wherever you are, ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker C:Who's listening here?
Speaker C:This is John from Legal Owl.
Speaker C:I'm so delighted to be back with everyone today and I feel a lot better.
Speaker C:The last couple of episodes I was probably smothering and now I seem a bit more normal.
Speaker C:So you might.
Speaker C:I might have the odd coffer here.
Speaker C:Anyway, I'm really excited about today's show because we're diving into something.
Speaker C:We're kind of leaving the experts and all that kind of stuff.
Speaker C:We're diving into something that's not really known much of and it kind of.
Speaker C:Is it in estate planning?
Speaker C:I don't know.
Speaker C:But this is about when someone is grieving, they've lost a loved one or they're moving forward in life and maybe they just don't know where they are financially.
Speaker C:They need a bit of legal assistance to deal with things that come up in terms of insurances.
Speaker C:My guest today is Steffi Presidge, who is an attorney with her and her husband, they run a fantastic service, a legal practice called Life Claim.
Speaker C:And when I saw this, I was quite struck because I deal with grief and grief with lawyers and grief in the world.
Speaker C:I'm very well known for that.
Speaker C:And this is something I get asked about a lot when I'm dealing with potential clients or even I'm helping a lawyer with grief.
Speaker C:Is there's an element to this that people don't know where to turn?
Speaker C:Well, maybe now we have a solution that I didn't really know existed because I'm not in that field.
Speaker C:So My guest is Stephanie Prestridge.
Speaker C:I can't wait to bring her on.
Speaker C:Let's bring her on and we'll talk now and have a great conversation.
Speaker C:Steffi, how are you?
Speaker A:I'm well, how are you?
Speaker C:I'm better, as I said just before when we were chatting.
Speaker C:Yeah, I'm feeling a lot, a bit more normal.
Speaker C:So I'm excited about today's discussion on legal oil because this is really important.
Speaker C:Not only does it cover the, the need for lawyers, but I want to talk a little bit more about how you got involved in this side of things, how you became a lawyer and what you do because you kind of champion the case for people who are probably suffering through the loss of loved ones gone through the grievance and they just don't know where to turn.
Speaker C:So let's talk a little bit about you and the history, how you got into the law and your passion now.
Speaker A:Absolutely.
Speaker A:Well, my story is a little convoluted.
Speaker A:I went to law school and straight out of law school got a fantastic position with a well regarded defense firm.
Speaker A:And I was doing international trade defense and maritime defense, which is a completely different world of practice.
Speaker A:And I had done really well.
Speaker A:I was sitting in this incredible office.
Speaker A:I had this window of wall of windows where I could see the Mississippi river behind me.
Speaker A:I had the wall in front of me, had every award I had ever won, every, you know, diploma, star degree, just in case I forgot.
Speaker A:And I needed that right.
Speaker A:To remind me of my own greatness.
Speaker C:You need to feel part of something.
Speaker A:You need to, yes, just in case, you know.
Speaker A:And I, I got a phone call from my, from my grandmother.
Speaker A:I call her Mama.
Speaker A:So Mama calls me and, and I remember I'm sitting at my desk and I'm working on something and she calls me and I'm, you know, hey Mama, I'm at work, is everything okay?
Speaker A:And she says that Popal, my grandfather has just been diagnosed with Parkinson's.
Speaker A:And she said, I need to know what, what are we going to do?
Speaker A:And, and I, I, I want to pause right there and share that.
Speaker A:I, I was one of the first in my family to go straight from high school to college, from college to a graduate degree.
Speaker A:And, and so there's, you know, obviously there's a lot of family pride in that, but there's also a lot of expectation because there's a lot of people saying, well, you've had all these opportunities.
Speaker A:When we come to you with these questions, we expect you to know.
Speaker A:And at that moment, at that moment it hit Me that for the people who mattered most, for.
Speaker A:For the situations that mattered most, I didn't have a clue how to help her.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And I remember telling her, I was like, well, Momo, call Mom.
Speaker A:You know, my mom's a nurse.
Speaker A:I was like, call mom.
Speaker A:Mom's a nurse.
Speaker A:She'll tell you which facilities are best, who has the best food, you know, call these people.
Speaker A:They'll talk to you about your money.
Speaker A:And she very, very quickly put me in my place, which she still does today.
Speaker A:She's very proud of it.
Speaker A:But she very quickly put me in my place, and she said, I didn't ask you, where do we go?
Speaker A:I asked you, what are we going to do?
Speaker C:Wow.
Speaker A:What about our home?
Speaker A:What about our investments?
Speaker A:What about the kids?
Speaker A:What are we going to do?
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker C:Wow.
Speaker A:And I didn't know.
Speaker A:I mean, how devastating is that?
Speaker A:I'm sitting here looking at this wall of all the things I did right, except for the one person that I love more than anything in this world.
Speaker A:I can't answer her question.
Speaker C:And so how did that feel inside?
Speaker C:Did we.
Speaker C:I mean, that must have destroyed your insight a little bit.
Speaker A:It did a little.
Speaker A:I. I mean, I was aware that not every lawyer has every answer.
Speaker A:You know, not every doctor has every answer.
Speaker A:I, you know, logically, I was aware of that emotionally.
Speaker A:You work this hard, you, you know, you study all of this information, and you, you, you are now in this position where one of your favorite people, you don't know how to answer their question.
Speaker A:Like, you don't even know where to begin on how to answer their question.
Speaker A:So for me, that was really humbling, and that's good.
Speaker A:I probably needed humbling.
Speaker A:We all do every now and again.
Speaker C:I get humbled a lot.
Speaker A:Yes, so do I.
Speaker C:My wife humbles me a lot, actually.
Speaker A:Oh.
Speaker A:I have kids.
Speaker A:Kids humble me every day.
Speaker A:But I did something kind of drastic.
Speaker A:I ended up moving back to my hometown to help take care of my grandparents.
Speaker A:And in doing that, I was smart enough to know that I couldn't be their lawyer, Right?
Speaker A:Because I didn't know everything I needed to do to help them.
Speaker A:So I helped them find a lawyer.
Speaker A:And then I proceeded to drive their lawyer bananas.
Speaker A:And I do mean I literally drove him bananas.
Speaker A:I must have called him, emailed him, and at one point, he actually called me, and he said, you know, if you were thinking about sending me another email, And I was like, actually, I'm so glad you called, because he says, no, no, no.
Speaker A:If you have any more questions, I have three files Sitting on a desk, show up and work them.
Speaker A:So he gave me a job and I took the job.
Speaker A:And that lawyer is very, very smart, very, very capable, ran in a very good firm.
Speaker A:And I say all of that because at the same time, how I interacted with that firm and how I learned was very different because I started on the other side of the table.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker C:You went from being respected and having all of that history and to something new.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:It wasn't just that.
Speaker A:It wasn't just that.
Speaker A:I, you know, didn't have a clue what to do.
Speaker A:But I also was walking in with my grandmother, and Mama is.
Speaker A:Remains one of the smartest women I know, and she's fierce.
Speaker A:I have watched her make a general cow like.
Speaker A:Like she has literally brought them down.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And she's just a leader by default.
Speaker A:She is incredibly smart, incredibly capable.
Speaker A:And I watched this woman who is independent and, and brilliant become afraid and small.
Speaker A:And that's quite a contrast.
Speaker C:And it's quite scary that.
Speaker C:To see someone that you hold such in high esteem to witness the fear in them.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And she was scared.
Speaker A:And I remember looking at the lawyers who were working this and sitting there with her, and they're doing what good lawyers do.
Speaker A:Yes, we know what your problem is.
Speaker A:Yes, we have a solution for this problem.
Speaker A:And we're going to do 1, 2, 3.
Speaker A:I need you to sign here, here, and here.
Speaker A:And it was all neatly wrapped up with a bow, except she was scared, and she still didn't understand everything.
Speaker A:She knew she needed to trust her lawyer.
Speaker A:She knew she needed to do what she was, but she was scared, and I wasn't okay with that.
Speaker A:And when I returned to the other side of the table, working with clients in estate planning matters, I carried that with me.
Speaker A:And I. I started being very cautious in how I gave information.
Speaker A:And not, not that I limited information, but I would always joke and tell them, you know, I'm blonde.
Speaker A:And so I'm going to put this in blonde terms because I can use really big legal words and, and, but it's not going to change.
Speaker A:You know, it's not going to make a difference if you don't understand it.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:So if you feel like I'm.
Speaker A:I'm bringing it down to, to too small of a level, you let me know.
Speaker A:Because I want to make sure that when you walk out of here, you can sit next to somebody in church and say, this is what I'm doing and this is why I'm doing it.
Speaker A:And it changed that conversation.
Speaker A:And I also made It a practice.
Speaker A:In fact, I wouldn't take a client unless they had other advisors.
Speaker A:So if they had a financial advisor, insurance advisor, I made it a practice to only work as part of the team.
Speaker A:Because one of the things that scared her the most is she has a lawyer saying, well, we need to make a change to this accountant, this beneficiary, and these different items.
Speaker A:And she was required to take that information and translate it for her advisor, who was just as scared as she was at that point, because they didn't know what we were doing or why.
Speaker A:And so it really changed how I talked to my clients, and it changed how I approached any case as a team.
Speaker A:And it was so beautiful.
Speaker A:It was a beautiful practice, and I loved it.
Speaker A:And my business grew.
Speaker A:So I started there as an estate attorney, really loving my clients and working with them.
Speaker A:I still love my clients.
Speaker A:They bring me cookies and chocolate.
Speaker C:You know, I said to you when I met you, I was like, you've got an amazing, compassionate, loving nature.
Speaker C:And I met some lawyers.
Speaker C:Wow.
Speaker C:I wouldn't want, you know, they don't.
Speaker C:They really don't at all.
Speaker C:And I think that's a beautiful thing because this is why you're doing what you do, which excites me.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:And then.
Speaker A:So as my practice grew, we had a case where we did an estate plan for a couple.
Speaker A:We knew that the husband was going to pass away, that he had.
Speaker A:He had cancer.
Speaker A:We knew that there was nothing we could do to prevent that, but we needed to do an estate plan that accounted for his, you know, young adult children or, like, you know, still teen, but not quite adult children.
Speaker A:And then, you know, an ex spouse and a current spouse and a business.
Speaker A:And so a lot of moving pieces.
Speaker A:And we created a very easy but, you know, sufficient estate plan that really balanced on the life insurance that they had.
Speaker A:So we knew that we were going to need that money to take care of the kids and provide for them the way they wanted.
Speaker A:We knew we were going to need some cash to wind down the business if it wasn't completed before he passed.
Speaker A:And then also to help his, you know, surviving widow to make sure that she was okay in the future.
Speaker A:And it was a beautiful plan.
Speaker A:It was going to work great.
Speaker A:When he passed, she called me and I said, okay, where's the life insurance?
Speaker A:Have you already submitted the application, you know, to have that sent to you?
Speaker A:Have you already received it?
Speaker A:Have you put it in the bank account?
Speaker A:Where's that?
Speaker A:Where's that money?
Speaker A:And she said, you know, funny enough, the insurance company sent me a letter and it said that they weren't going to pay this.
Speaker A:And they sent me this check that's returning the premiums that, you know, they, they, we put into this policy.
Speaker A:And she was like, do I need to deposit that check?
Speaker A:And I was like, wow, absolutely not.
Speaker A:Do not deposit that check and then bring all of this to me.
Speaker A:And I'm looking at it and I'm sitting there with my husband, who is, he is the best attorney.
Speaker A:I'm so proud of him.
Speaker A:He's just such an amazing attorney.
Speaker C:And at one point, we're going to get you both on legality.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Oh, then you're going to realize how much smarter he is.
Speaker A:But we were sitting there looking at this and, and I was flabbergasted.
Speaker A:And that's a true, true feeling, true world, because I, I had, I had no idea that that could happen.
Speaker A:I'm a lawyer who works in estate planning and I had no idea that this could happen.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And I'm not just in a lawyer who does estate plans.
Speaker A:I'm a lawyer who actually likes life insurance.
Speaker A:And there's plenty of people who don't and their reasons make sense.
Speaker A:And I just happen to like it, you know, so I'm looking at it going, oh my gosh, not only can this happen, but oh my gosh, I have like all of this life insurance, you know, at home.
Speaker A:Could this really happen again?
Speaker A:I, it was a, how could I be unaware?
Speaker A:And then two, what am I going to do?
Speaker A:And so I am, I am not the litigator in our firm.
Speaker A:I don't, I don't like to, to fight very hard.
Speaker C:That's your husband that does the fight?
Speaker A:Oh, yeah.
Speaker A:Oh, yeah.
Speaker A:He's scrappy.
Speaker A:Yes, he's scrappy.
Speaker A:And he, he looked at it and he was immediately angry, right?
Speaker A:He's like, this isn't okay.
Speaker A:This is not how it's supposed to work.
Speaker A:Like, you had this policy, you were checked out, you did all of the health questionnaire, you did everything you were supposed to do.
Speaker A:You paid for this policy.
Speaker A:This is not how it's supposed to work.
Speaker A:So he challenged that.
Speaker A:And, you know, we sat down and looked at options.
Speaker A:And I will be the first to admit, I was like, babe, I don't know.
Speaker A:I don't know if this is going to work.
Speaker A:I don't, I didn't know it could happen.
Speaker A:So I have no idea.
Speaker C:And can I ask you before you kind of, what was their reasoning behind this?
Speaker A:He was in a two year contestability period.
Speaker A:So A lot of people don't know when you get life insurance for the first two years, they call that a contestability period.
Speaker A:So if you pass away within the first two years of owning that policy, they reserve the right to go back and check all of your medical history all over again.
Speaker A:And what they're really looking for is a basis to say, hey, wait, had we known this, we would not have issued that policy.
Speaker C:Right.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker A:So we were in that two year contestability period.
Speaker A:And so we pushed back.
Speaker A:And my husband sent a very strongly worded letter, and they sent a very strongly worded letter back to him.
Speaker A:But it was interesting because they told in that letter all of the reasons why they were right and he was wrong and that they can't believe that he challenged them.
Speaker A:And oh, by the way, here's your check for this policy, the entire policy.
Speaker A:And it was that moment where he looked at me and he said, we're never gonna let this happen again because it happened.
Speaker C:I love that.
Speaker C:Because that is the deciding.
Speaker C:The whole paradigm shifts.
Speaker A:Yes, exactly.
Speaker C:And your whole ontology shifts.
Speaker C:Just an ontological shock.
Speaker C:Boom, you're gone.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:And he made a commitment to grow that practice.
Speaker A:And then I was right there with him working these cases with, and learning and helping the clients.
Speaker A:And it's pretty much become our primary practice at this point.
Speaker A:And it's so heartbreaking because so many people don't know.
Speaker A:There's so many people who are just like me that had no idea that this can happen.
Speaker A:And then you don't know what to do.
Speaker A:And then you couple it with the fact that when you find out something happens, somebody's just passed.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So now you're grieving, you're stressed, and the funds that were there, that were created to provide financial security or to allow for you to bury your, your, your family member, all of a sudden that's being taken away.
Speaker A:So not only are we adding to your stress, adding to your financial complications, we are also, in some degree, like, minimizing the value of the life that was insured.
Speaker A:Because that's how people feel.
Speaker A:If you're not going to pay this policy, you didn't.
Speaker A:You don't care about my person.
Speaker A:And it's not okay.
Speaker C:Hi.
Speaker C:If you are a legal expert or an expert witness and you would like to join our exclusive legal community, then connect with me on Help Lawyer and let's have a conversation.
Speaker C:Do you know, it's interesting because I know when we connected at first and I mentioned to you I'm well known for grief, I research it I'm writing a thesis on aspects of it.
Speaker C:I had so many people come to me in my work, in grief counseling, working with people who have lost loved ones that have said to me, I don't know where to turn.
Speaker C:And the problem is that they're financially left destitute, and they don't know how to cope with it.
Speaker C:And I didn't have an answer.
Speaker C:I mean, I have an answer now.
Speaker C:I have you.
Speaker C:You guys.
Speaker C:But I didn't have an answer.
Speaker C:I'm like, look, I can help you through your suffering.
Speaker C:I can be there.
Speaker C:I can hold you when you're.
Speaker C:You're terrified.
Speaker C:But I don't know.
Speaker C:I don't have the answer.
Speaker C:And it came to me.
Speaker C:More and more people were like, financially, what do I do?
Speaker C:And now I'm finding that this is a big problem.
Speaker C:Bigger than I even thought it was.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:It's heartbreaking to see how common a problem it is where it doesn't matter if it's a small policy or a huge policy.
Speaker A:You know, people have relied on them.
Speaker A:They've held them for a very long time.
Speaker A:It's almost like a core component of their entire estate, you know, and they look at it with pride or with purpose.
Speaker A:It has a reason for being there, or they're very proud that they were maintaining that.
Speaker A:I've seen cases where people, you know, would cut back on other expenses, but they kept that life insurance policy because they knew it was going to take care of their family in those circumstances.
Speaker A:And then to be told that, you know, we're not going to pay it, or we're going to challenge if it's being paid or we don't like something.
Speaker A:So we're going to go back and review if we can find a foothold to not pay it.
Speaker A:No one is.
Speaker C:I've heard this before.
Speaker C:I could be wrong, but there's been cases, I believe, where insurance companies have said, we're not paying for this because it was an act of God.
Speaker C:Case in point.
Speaker C:We went through Helene here devastated.
Speaker C:A lot of people lost.
Speaker C:People had life insurance policies, and they lost their loved ones.
Speaker C:Now, I don't know if this is 100% accurate, but people were.
Speaker C:Insurance companies weren't paying for property and other things.
Speaker C:And I did hear at certain points that life insurance policies weren't being paid either, because they were saying it was an act of God, it wasn't an illness, it was an act of God.
Speaker C:Is that a particular problem?
Speaker A:So I have to tell you, both life and death are an act of God.
Speaker A:So I don't think that the life insurance company would have had a leg to stand on.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:On that.
Speaker A:But I think maybe what you heard, the life insurance should have paid out regardless if it's an act of God, if a tree fell on you, if a flood got you, it's not the same as property insurance.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Where they come in and say it was an act of God, we're not going to pay this.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker A:Event life insurance is literally, you know, if you've got it and it's in good state, you know, when someone passes away, allegedly it's going to pay out.
Speaker C:Right, right.
Speaker A:But a lot of people confuse accidental death and dismemberment policies with traditional life insurance policies.
Speaker C:Right.
Speaker A:So accidental death policies are very, very restrictive and in nature saying, you know, if you pass away in an accident and oh, by the way, we're going to define what an accident means and it does not what you think.
Speaker C:Right.
Speaker A:So in that case, the insurance company, I feel very comfortably confident that this is probably what happened where people were trying to make a claim on their accidental death policy and companies would have come in and said it was an act of God, it was not an accident and therefore we will not pay.
Speaker C:What do they typically, Steph, what do they typically push back on?
Speaker C:What is the main thing that they will push back on?
Speaker C:Is it that two year period or is there any other issues like do they go back in and think, well, that illness didn't cause this or what
Speaker A:is depends on the type of policy.
Speaker A:But some of the most common ones are you're in that two year contestability period.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:A lot of times when they're checking the status of a policy, they'll come in and say, we don't think this policy was current.
Speaker A:Like were you maintaining your premiums and doing that properly?
Speaker A:Or they'll come in and say, we've got concerns.
Speaker A:Because there were a significant number of beneficiary changes all of a sudden.
Speaker A:So they're really looking at the status of the policy, the status of your health, the cause of death.
Speaker A:So if they think your death is suspicious or it occurred in a suspicious location, they'll delay or deny paying out those benefits.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Sometimes people just call up and say, I don't think that that's who the beneficiary was intended to be.
Speaker A:We want to challenge this.
Speaker A:And so at life insurance company will say, wait, there's a challenge.
Speaker A:We're not exactly sure who we need to pay here.
Speaker A:So again, they'll hold those funds and just wait for everybody.
Speaker A:To figure out what they're supposed to do.
Speaker A:Health and medications are typically the things that we see quite often, especially when we're looking at accidental death policies.
Speaker A:A lot of people don't know that you can fight those.
Speaker A:And they're, I don't know, it just, it hurts because people have them.
Speaker A:And then they'll be told, well, you can't, you can't, we're not going to pay for it, it's not an accident, or it didn't happen the way we expected, or we think your premium wasn't done just right.
Speaker A:And they stop fighting because they don't know that they have a choice or if they try to fight on their own.
Speaker A:This is so common here lately that they will try to use AI to help them, you know, respond to the questions.
Speaker A:And this is, this is interesting.
Speaker A:At this point, we're seeing it happen.
Speaker A:We're actually having the life insurance companies tell us we're seeing this happen and they're, they're gleeful about it.
Speaker A:Because what sounds really good to, to you when you're reading it and thinking, okay, these are all of these wonderful arguments, it sounds fabulous.
Speaker A:It really is not addressing any of the problems.
Speaker A:Right, so you'll send it off to the life insurance company, they'll deny it as they, you know, they're looking at it going, you didn't answer our questions, you didn't do what we needed to do.
Speaker A:And then when someone tries to appeal, they don't know the rules.
Speaker A:And the rules change with the different types of policies.
Speaker A:So whether it's, you know, a personal policy, a work related policy, an accidental death policy, all of the rules are different.
Speaker A:And when you don't know the rules and you're relying on AI to draft your briefs, it's making it so much easier for the life insurance companies to deny these, these benefits.
Speaker A:It's to the point, my husband has a theory.
Speaker A:He says, I actually think that the push to use AI in these appeals is being done by the life insurance companies because it's so beneficial to them.
Speaker C:I was going to ask that because, I mean, I did an episode on Legal L where I talked about AI where I said, this is not.
Speaker C:I see it everywhere, like in our Instagram channel for Help Lawyer and for Legal Oil.
Speaker C:I see it all the time.
Speaker C:AI for this case, AI for the next case, AI for personal injury.
Speaker C:I'm like, are lawyers now just turning and getting all their work done through AI as well?
Speaker C:And who's driving this?
Speaker C:Because who's benefiting?
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker C:Is the Lawyer really benefiting, or is this getting pushed by another organization?
Speaker A:I think AI has its place and I don't want to push people away from it.
Speaker A:I just want to understand how it works properly.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And so using it to fight a company or using it to file your appeal, if you don't know the right questions to ask, then AI cannot provide the best assistance because you don't know the rules.
Speaker A:And AI is not going to be able to go find every single set of rules for you to use in each particular case.
Speaker A:So you've got a very particular topic where you've got to find out, which questions do I need to ask, which deadlines do I need to follow?
Speaker A:How do things need to be submitted?
Speaker A:How long is this going to take?
Speaker A:You are set up to fail if you don't have someone who lives in that world and can help you and guide you through that process.
Speaker C:I think it's important as well, especially for you, Steph, and your husband, that there's an element there where taking AI aside is.
Speaker C:There's little compassion.
Speaker C:The AI is just data.
Speaker C:It's human centric.
Speaker C:It has to be put in by.
Speaker C:It's just identifying what is out there that a human has put in and it's scraped that data.
Speaker C:But you're dealing with people's emotions and their life, and there has to be something very unique to that because as you've said, you're very compassionate.
Speaker C:You love your clients.
Speaker C:It must be hard as well for you to see the suffering in those people when they come to you.
Speaker A:It is.
Speaker A:I will say that I'm extremely blessed because my husband and I are a good balance with each other.
Speaker A:He is very much so.
Speaker A:The strategist and the litigator.
Speaker A:I'm good at that.
Speaker A:But he shines in that.
Speaker C:Yeah, he's really good.
Speaker A:And so he carries a lot of that burden.
Speaker A:He is also very quiet.
Speaker A:And while he loves people, he also loves to be in a quiet room by himself and do his work.
Speaker A:So I carry a lot of the client load because I love them and I care about them, and sometimes it is overwhelming.
Speaker A:I talk to crying people every single day, and I am.
Speaker A:But I just love them, even if it's a stranger.
Speaker A:I had someone send me an email this morning saying, you didn't have to call me.
Speaker A:What I needed had nothing to do with the services you provide.
Speaker A:But you called me and I'm so thankful for it.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And I just feel like it's just
Speaker C:such a small thing, though.
Speaker C:That makes a massive difference, right?
Speaker C:Especially.
Speaker A:Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker A:Whether you're a lawyer or just a, you know, just somebody down the road, it just.
Speaker A:It, It, It.
Speaker A:It carries a huge toll, and it does take time, but it's.
Speaker A:I've.
Speaker A:I'm able to do that because of the balance in our firm.
Speaker A:So we've got people who carry, you know, those loads of.
Speaker A:And it's also neat because, like, we have nurses on staff who work with us.
Speaker A:And so.
Speaker A:And not just any nurses.
Speaker A:We actually have this amazing group of former emergency room nurses.
Speaker A:So they saw everything.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And their compassion and their ability to have insight into people is.
Speaker A:They're amazing.
Speaker A:I love watching them work.
Speaker A:And there are times when I will say, this client doesn't need to hear from me.
Speaker A:I need one of our nurses to call them.
Speaker A:And to this day, I have emails from people saying, hey, I love you, but I really want to talk to Nurse Summer or Nurse Chris.
Speaker A:And it's really.
Speaker A:I love that.
Speaker A:I love that we can provide that community.
Speaker C:You know, I find it remarkable how you've approached this.
Speaker C:And I think.
Speaker C:I mean, I didn't know that you had nurses that were on staff and stuff.
Speaker C:I mean, and when anybody's watching this, you maybe look at Steph and you hear about her husband and you think that this is just her and a secretary, but you actually have a full.
Speaker C:A full staff nurses and everything, which is phenomenal.
Speaker C:And as I'm thinking about this, and I'm talking to you, and I think about those who are going through the grieving process, who have lost a loved one.
Speaker C:We tend to think that they're older in life and they're getting to that point.
Speaker C:But what I want to ask you is, is that the case, Is it mainly older people?
Speaker C:Are you finding now that this is even in our younger generation?
Speaker C:And should we be prepared more than what we are?
Speaker A:Absolutely.
Speaker A:We should be prepared more.
Speaker A:I'm seeing a lot of parents burying their children.
Speaker A:In fact, before I came to visit with you, the four cases sitting on my desk are all parents burying their children, either from homicide or from, you know, alleged overdoses or using prescription medication, according to the prescription, but, you know, they still pass away.
Speaker A:I'm seeing more and more parents burying more of their children.
Speaker A:And there are, you know, obviously still the elderly and, you know, those particular cases.
Speaker A:But I can't say that it's an equal balance.
Speaker A:In our cases, we take all kinds.
Speaker A:And the ones where the parents are worried about their kids, that.
Speaker A:Those are hard.
Speaker A:Those are hard.
Speaker C:I was gonna say, how do you deal and cope with that personally, yourself as a family oriented woman and mother.
Speaker C:And you know, how do you cope with that?
Speaker C:When someone who's lost their daughter or their son through a tragedy or even an illness and they have got no finance, they don't know where they're turning, they may have a lapse.
Speaker C:And let me ask you this, if they have a lapse policy, can you still help them?
Speaker A:Not much.
Speaker A:Not much.
Speaker C:So they need the policies.
Speaker A:Oh yes, sometimes we'll look at a lapse policy if like it's been less than 30 days.
Speaker A:And I mean that.
Speaker A:Those are hard, those are super hard.
Speaker A:But, but we'll, we'll fight those sometimes.
Speaker A:But, but you know, I get emails all the time where people are saying, you know, it was supposed to come out of my checking account and I don't know why they didn't take it out of my checking account.
Speaker A:And now they say it's lapsed.
Speaker A:And, and oh, you know, how did this happen?
Speaker A:Is there anything you can do?
Speaker A:And at that point it's too far gone.
Speaker C:Wow.
Speaker A:And then another thing that happens a lot, and this is really important sometimes, you know, someone will miss a payment for whatever reason and they'll catch that they miss their payment and they'll call the life insurance company and they'll say, gosh, wait, you know, this happened.
Speaker A:Can you please, you know, re pull this funds out of my account?
Speaker A:Can you reinstate my policy?
Speaker A:Can, you know, can we do what we need to do?
Speaker A:And the insurance company will quite often say yes and they'll reinstate that policy and you'll, you know, make your premiums again.
Speaker A:But what they don't understand is that the minute they reinstated that policy, that two year contestability, I was going to ask that.
Speaker A:Started all over.
Speaker A:Started all over.
Speaker C:I was, I wondered that.
Speaker C:I was, I thought that's where you were going because that's the restart.
Speaker C:But how many people know that?
Speaker C:They don't know that.
Speaker A:No budding.
Speaker A:No budding.
Speaker C:Because if I was in the case and I lost it and I phoned up, said, oh my God, you know, I would just expect them to start and it would be okay.
Speaker A:Yeah, reinstated.
Speaker A:That's what they hear.
Speaker A:Well, no, we said it was reinstated.
Speaker A:So what do you mean that it's like we started all over?
Speaker A:Yeah, that's exactly what happens if you're a lawyer.
Speaker C:Then I invite you to consider joining our exclusive legal network on Help Lawyer.
Speaker C:Just send me a message and we will book a time to have a private conversation together.
Speaker C:What is the worst case that you have?
Speaker C:You and your husband, or let me reframe that.
Speaker C:What is the most heartfelt case that you have had?
Speaker C:Without compromising anybody's identities or anything, but what's the most heartfelt case that you've fought and won?
Speaker A:I've got two for me.
Speaker A:I'll share his.
Speaker A:He had a case where there was a homicide, and for 17 years, the police department maintained a spouse as a person of interest.
Speaker A:Now, this spouse in no way could have committed this crime at all.
Speaker A:Just.
Speaker A:Just no way.
Speaker A:But they didn't want to amend their persons of interest list.
Speaker A:So for 17 years, she was denied those benefits until he was able to step in and say, this is.
Speaker A:This is unacceptable.
Speaker A:In this case, we had a spouse with a significant disability that rendered that person completely incapable of committing the alleged crime.
Speaker A:But 17 years, and she didn't know.
Speaker A:She was grieving and trying to just make it day to day until finally, 17 years later, he steps in and says, you have rights.
Speaker A:We have to fight for this.
Speaker A:And he did.
Speaker A:And I'm so proud of him for that.
Speaker A:I was.
Speaker A:Oh, yeah, of course.
Speaker C:Well, I can't wait to speak to him about that myself, actually.
Speaker A:He's really cool.
Speaker A:So the.
Speaker A:The other two are also his cases, but I worked with him on these.
Speaker A:One of them was an accidental death case, and he is.
Speaker A:He particularly loves working those cases because people have them and they're denied all the time.
Speaker A:Like, you know, are they really?
Speaker C:So accidental death is always denied.
Speaker A:Always denied, Always denied.
Speaker A:And he loves them because he fights back with them and he gets them paid.
Speaker C:Does your husband play chess?
Speaker A:He does.
Speaker C:I knew that.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:He's good.
Speaker A:He's great.
Speaker C:Competitive.
Speaker A:Oh, yes, yes.
Speaker A:He's my favorite person.
Speaker A:But he had a case.
Speaker A:Where is it?
Speaker A:Accidental death policy man allegedly was drinking and had a motorcycle accident and was killed.
Speaker A:Parents are trying to recover from both the life insurance and the accidental death policy.
Speaker A:Insurer says, nope, we believe there was alcohol in his system, and we're not paying.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And Michael was able to.
Speaker A:To fight that and.
Speaker A:And, you know, just.
Speaker A:Just dispute that.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And he won.
Speaker A:And it was a hard win, but he won and he gave me.
Speaker A:I'm so proud of him.
Speaker A:But he gave me the pleasure of calling the family and telling them that, you know, and they knew me because I'd worked with them, you know, on the appeal and.
Speaker A:And talked to them about, you know, their child and information, but he allowed me to call them and let them know we won, that they reversed.
Speaker C:That's amazing.
Speaker C:That's getting me goosebumps.
Speaker A:Actually, I was so excited, and it was actually really, really fun because the.
Speaker A:There was a surviving sibling, and I think that person's looking to get married in the next, you know, year or two.
Speaker A:And I am.
Speaker A:I told the family.
Speaker A:I was like, look, you know, we've become close over all this time.
Speaker A:I have this thing in my family where when someone gets married, I always buy their shoes.
Speaker A:Like, that's just my thing.
Speaker A:I'll buy your shoes.
Speaker A:I don't care if you want flip flops.
Speaker A:I don't care if you want a pair of Louboutins.
Speaker A:I'm gonna buy your shoes.
Speaker A:That's it.
Speaker A:I'm gonna buy your shoes.
Speaker A:And everybody's gonna be calling you for me to buy shoes now.
Speaker A:But that's just my thing.
Speaker C:You need new shoes for your wedding.
Speaker A:You gotta get married.
Speaker A:But I said, when you.
Speaker A:When, you know, when your daughter gets married, I would like to buy her shoes.
Speaker C:Oh, wow.
Speaker A:And they were.
Speaker A:They were so sweet.
Speaker A:They were like, that's just amazing.
Speaker A:But I just.
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker A:That's how we get close, you know, And I love that.
Speaker A:Just as a side note, I do not buy shoes for every person who has.
Speaker A:And then the other one that was special to me, this is one where I. I just love this client.
Speaker A:I became friends with this client.
Speaker A:Her husband had passed.
Speaker A:There was a huge dispute in the family over his mental status.
Speaker A:And it was.
Speaker A:What was done to her was not okay.
Speaker A:It was just.
Speaker A:It was heartbreaking.
Speaker A:And she was fighting not because she wanted to keep all of the policy benefits, but because that was her way of holding onto her spouse.
Speaker C:Right, I get that.
Speaker C:Because you'll hold on to anything that's connected, and it's very hard to let go.
Speaker A:And it was one where, you know, we ended up going to trial and sitting there with her.
Speaker A:And in the end, the right thing was done.
Speaker A:There was a settlement on the eve of trial, and she felt like she was letting her deceased spouse down because she settled.
Speaker C:Oh, God, love them.
Speaker A:And I just remember sitting there with her going, but you're free.
Speaker A:You're free.
Speaker A:And now.
Speaker A:Now we can celebrate his life.
Speaker A:And you can grieve because you haven't grieved this whole time.
Speaker A:And I just.
Speaker A:I don't know.
Speaker A:I've kept in touch with her, and she called me at one point.
Speaker A:She was like, you're right.
Speaker A:I needed to grieve.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:But she's getting better.
Speaker A:And I just.
Speaker C:It's important, I think, for people to realize that we often can't grieve because of the financial instability that loved ones are left behind in.
Speaker C:And that is not a healthy thing because now we have the possibility of developing psychosis, other mental illnesses.
Speaker C:And unfortunately, I hate to say this, but I have known of people who have taken their own lives because they can't cope, and financially they can't cope.
Speaker C:And I think that's important to.
Speaker C:To realize that the quicker that you can be proactive rather than reactive, it saves all this problem.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And I would note, as a, you know, an attack to that is that we can't make a process go faster.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Anything that has to involve a lawyer is, you know, unfortunately, it's slow.
Speaker A:Even though we try to move very quickly and we try to handle everything as quickly as possible, it's slow.
Speaker A:But I always tell people that understanding is power.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And so as we go through this process, I. I can't make you any promises as to whether we'll win or we'll lose or what's going to happen, but I can promise you that as we go through this process, whether it's me or one of our nurses or my husband or whomever you talk to, we're going to sit there and make sure that.
Speaker A:Do you understand where we are right now?
Speaker A:This is why we're doing what we're doing, so that you feel like you have some power in this process.
Speaker A:It's.
Speaker A:You don't have to carry the weight of it, but you do have an understanding of why I'm here and why we're having to do this next thing.
Speaker A:And that's probably in a very hard process.
Speaker A:That's one of the best gifts I can give, is just knowing you don't have to carry the burden of it.
Speaker A:But I want to give you the gift of understanding why we're doing it.
Speaker C:Steffi, do the insurance companies deliberately hold things up in the hope that someday will give up?
Speaker A:I think so.
Speaker C:I mean, you've got no proof of that.
Speaker C:But again, this is an assumption.
Speaker C:But it seems like a good assumption to me.
Speaker A:It is.
Speaker A:If Michael were here, my husband, he would say, absolutely.
Speaker A:I tend to.
Speaker A:I see the companies and then I see the people in the companies.
Speaker A:And so I think, like the company, yes.
Speaker A:I think the company's doing whatever is necessary for their bottom line.
Speaker A:I think that there are good people inside of those companies.
Speaker A:So it's harder for me to say, yes, they're doing this deliberately and they're all villains because I think the corporate culture is terrible.
Speaker A:I think that they're there for business.
Speaker A:I don't want to vilify all the people that work in those companies, though I think my husband would be the first to say, yes, they're all terrible, but I think it's business.
Speaker A:They're conducting business.
Speaker C:As you know, when we spoke before as well, I told you I have a military background.
Speaker C:And so I'm very, very passionate about my brothers and sisters in arms.
Speaker C:And I've come across, and I don't know whether you and your husband deal with this, but I've come across so many times with spouses who have or, you know, have lost their loved ones on the battlefield.
Speaker C:Have you had any cases where you've had to fight the corner for the military, Military folks?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:So we've had to fight a number of Fegli Sigli, you know, base claims.
Speaker A:We weren't necessarily fighting.
Speaker A:Well, actually we were fighting the military in one case.
Speaker A:This is Michael's story.
Speaker A:He'll tell it much better than me.
Speaker A:But it was a case where the service member was just trying to update their beneficiaries and they did it properly.
Speaker A:There's a very specific process that you have to do and it's from completing the paperwork to handing it off to the right person next in line.
Speaker A:And then it has to be submitted.
Speaker A:And this person did all of the right things except the person who received it.
Speaker A:The right person who received it lost the original paperwork.
Speaker A:And so insurance company said, we're not going to pay.
Speaker A:Didn't follow the right process, not going to happen.
Speaker A:And I mean, it was ridiculous.
Speaker A:We had affidavits from all of the people saying, nope, the paper was completed, it was turned in, it was done this way, had an affidavit from the person who received it.
Speaker A:The right ranking person who received and said, I, you know, believe I put it here, but if there was a loss, it's my fault, not the service members fault.
Speaker A:That should never have happened.
Speaker A:That should never have happened.
Speaker C:No, absolutely.
Speaker A:So we did have to fight to get that one.
Speaker A:We did.
Speaker A:When?
Speaker A:Well, Michael won that one.
Speaker A:That was, that one was all his.
Speaker A:But that's one of those ridiculous.
Speaker A:And I get, you know, form over substance.
Speaker A:Like, and that's a really important thing to note is that form is often more important than substance with this.
Speaker A:So that form of did you fill out the right paperwork?
Speaker A:Did you sign it properly?
Speaker A:Did you check?
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:And so there, you know, they were saying, well, no, no, no, based on form, there's no policy, we're not paying.
Speaker A:And we're like, no, no, no, wait, we got you.
Speaker A:But we Followed the substance of the form here.
Speaker A:And, and like anything that happened was not that person's fault.
Speaker A:So you're going to.
Speaker A:You're going to penalize the person who did everything right.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And it just, it wasn't the right thing to do.
Speaker A:And other, you know, cases with military policies, we've had, you know, we've worked with families where there was a dispute on who should be paid and, you know, who were the beneficiaries or was it done properly.
Speaker A:So a lot of times it's.
Speaker A:It's fighting infighting as, versus necessarily just fighting.
Speaker C:Yeah, I was going to ask that as well.
Speaker C:Is the potential in fighting in the families that can hold things up.
Speaker C:Is that, Is that the potential?
Speaker C:Probably one of the worst problems.
Speaker A:It's very, very common.
Speaker A:Very, very common.
Speaker A:I would probably say that health and challenges to medical status is probably one of the most common.
Speaker A:But right there behind it are family disputes.
Speaker C:Wow.
Speaker C:How do you cope with the family disputes then?
Speaker C:Because obviously that could really.
Speaker C:I mean, it can hurt the work that you're doing.
Speaker A:We can only represent one side of the family.
Speaker C:No, exactly.
Speaker C:You can't represent everybody.
Speaker C:But is there some tells, is there some behavior that you go into a case and you know that this is coming?
Speaker A:So usually when we see them, that dispute's already exploded.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:It's already gone.
Speaker C:Right.
Speaker A:So as an estate attorney, you know, I'll take that step back and say that a lot of times when people would come to me to do, like, their will or their trust or, you know, anything along those lines, before we had a tragedy of somebody passing, you always ask them, you know, what's going on.
Speaker A:Tell me what you're worried about.
Speaker A:Tell me what you're excited about.
Speaker A:Tell me what are the things that need to keep happening if you're not here, you know, who.
Speaker A:Who has this strength?
Speaker A:Who has this particular weakness?
Speaker A:Tell me about your people.
Speaker A:And most lawyers, I think, start with, tell me about your property and then
Speaker C:tell me about your people.
Speaker A:Yeah, yeah, I need to know about your people because your property is going to go like.
Speaker A:And it's either going to be great or it's going to be bad, but your property is going to go.
Speaker A:But how.
Speaker A:How your people work.
Speaker A:And, and did we account for their strengths?
Speaker A:Did we account for their weaknesses?
Speaker A:You know, let's talk about your people so that we know how to best protect your property.
Speaker A:And, you know, I. I will sit with families that will talk about, well, we're going to name our son and our daughter, and they both have to Agree.
Speaker A:And I always ask them, do they get along at Thanksgiving?
Speaker A:Like, do you, do they.
Speaker A:Do you have a good, fun family Thanksgiving?
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:And how many people are like, well, no, you know, I was like, do they fight over the gravy?
Speaker A:Because if they fight over the gravy, I don't want them to have to agree on whether or not you receive medical treatment because it's going to fail.
Speaker A:You're going to die waiting for them to agree on something.
Speaker A:So it's asking good questions at the right time.
Speaker A:And I would note that when these disputes happen, it's not because people are bad people.
Speaker A:There are some bad people, but I just.
Speaker A:I think that unresolved relationships are the biggest problems that we see.
Speaker A:So when you have siblings that have an issue that haven't been resolved, when you've got parents that fed into a bad problem or, you know, if.
Speaker A:If parents did some action or siblings did some action and it was never addressed or discussed or, you know, changes were made and at least people weren't advised that, hey, I'm paying attention.
Speaker A:I'm not going to tell you everything I own or everything I've done, but I want you to know I've made some changes.
Speaker A:And whether you like it or you don't, I love you.
Speaker A:All of that matters.
Speaker A:And I can't make that up for somebody.
Speaker A:Michael can't make that up for somebody when we're in the middle of a war trying to, you know, protect these benefits or get these benefits.
Speaker A:So I think that's the hardest thing for me is having to make up for conversations that weren't had when they should have been had.
Speaker C:And I think within the family dynamic, there's always a lot of guilt and shame.
Speaker C:And when that comes into it, then that causes even further, deeper disputes.
Speaker C:And I think then when they get into the process of dealing with a loved one, either do you shut off the machine or how they deal or they split up the estate, they're driven by their emotion rather than anything else.
Speaker A:Absolutely.
Speaker A:Anger.
Speaker A:There's a lot of anger.
Speaker A:Lots and lots of anger.
Speaker A:And I think anger is a replacement for fear.
Speaker A:But for a very long time, yeah.
Speaker C:Do you ever have any of the family coming at you?
Speaker C:Not one that you're representing, but do you ever have family disputes and then the other party tried to get in touch with you to try and plead their case or they.
Speaker A:They've never done that to me.
Speaker A:I don't believe they've ever done that to Michael.
Speaker A:Because we're very clear from the get go, we Send out, you know, letters saying, this is our client.
Speaker A:You know, you, you cannot speak directly to our client.
Speaker A:You have a lawyer.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:So we're very, very cut and try, you know, dry about that.
Speaker A:I've had, I've had clients that disagreed with me.
Speaker A:I, and, and I'm always the one who takes like the neutral or the opposite perspective.
Speaker A:So, you know, like, I'm going to fight my case.
Speaker A:But if you want to sit down and go over, you know, facts, in fact, my nurses, this makes them so mad.
Speaker A:They get so mad at me because they'll sit there and say, well, I see this and this and this and this is how we're going to win this case.
Speaker A:And I'm like, eh, I don't know if it's a big deal.
Speaker A:Like, you know, I think there's a different way to look at that because whatever argument we use, I want it to be our best.
Speaker A:And I also try very hard to have, like, just an open perspective, to see a different side so that we don't fall in love with our own position.
Speaker A:So I have clients who have been like, I don't want you to say that, I don't want you to say that you understand where this person's coming from.
Speaker A:I'm your client and you just need to see my position.
Speaker A:And I always apologize and I'm like, but that's not how I work.
Speaker A:And you're going to be mad if I wasn't prepared for where they're coming from.
Speaker C:Yeah, you need to know, you need to have the intelligence on how they're going to operate.
Speaker A:Yeah, it's fun.
Speaker C:What about your, your, your nurses that you work with now?
Speaker C:Do they, do you teach them more about the law as well?
Speaker C:Do they have an understanding of what they're dealing with?
Speaker A:They, they learn as they go, but they are, man, they're formidable.
Speaker A:They are amazing.
Speaker A:I, I, they, they are so smart.
Speaker A:And you have to be, I think nurses are just incredible.
Speaker A:And they're so smart because I'll go in and say, okay, here's the problem, you know, here's why this is being denied.
Speaker A:They're saying that, you know, this was a, you know, like, this was an overdose, you know, instead of like, using medication properly or they're saying that this was a medical event that caused the accident, not the accident that caused the medical event.
Speaker A:And, and so they really just kind of, page by page, go through these records and explain things to us where we can look at it.
Speaker A:And they've come to me before and said, all right, You're.
Speaker A:This is.
Speaker A:This is not one where we know how to.
Speaker A:You know, how to argue our way out of it, or, hey, we went back and we caught this, and.
Speaker A:And they're really neat because they come at it, and they don't just see, like, the doctor's notes or the medical records.
Speaker A:Like, as nurses.
Speaker A:They're coming in and they're saying, I know the conversation behind this.
Speaker A:And so here's some questions that you should ask.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker A:When you do a deposition.
Speaker C:Experience as nurses.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:And they have seen everything in the emergency room.
Speaker A:So when they talk, we listen.
Speaker C:How did you.
Speaker C:How did you pick your nurses?
Speaker C:Did you have a particular.
Speaker C:What were you looking for in them that you.
Speaker C:When you said, okay, come and join the firm?
Speaker A:So I have to admit, one of them is family.
Speaker A:My mom.
Speaker A:Actually, we started with my mom because I was calling, no way.
Speaker C:Your mom's your mom.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:So I have to sing her praises.
Speaker A:She was the first nurse in the state of Louisiana to get 100% on the nurse estate bar exam.
Speaker A:She's fantastic.
Speaker A:And so she would.
Speaker A:I would call her, and I'm like, mom, I'm reading these records, and I know what an artery is.
Speaker A:I know what a vein is.
Speaker A:I took this class, but, oh, my gosh, it's talking about, like, a liver and a kidney.
Speaker A:Are they connected?
Speaker A:And she was just like.
Speaker A:So she would come sit here, and she would.
Speaker A:She would go through these records and try to explain them for me.
Speaker A:And finally, she's like, I'm just gonna send Michael an email on what all of this is.
Speaker A:And Michael's like, I don't need Stephanie to be your middleman anymore.
Speaker A:Just come in.
Speaker A:And so we started with her making sure I didn't, you know, make mistakes on veins and arteries and livers and kidneys.
Speaker A:And from there, she just.
Speaker A:She was so passionate about some of this, and some of it's because, you know, like, I have a sister that passed a very long time ago, and that life insurance was.
Speaker A:Her life insurance was paid out, but we had to fight for, you know, other parts of her estate.
Speaker A:So I was calling her to make sure I didn't screw up on.
Speaker A:On a document.
Speaker A:But it really became something she was passionate about, particularly with our elder clients who, when we're looking at, like, issues of, you know, dementia or, you know, changing capacity, you know, whether it's true or not, like.
Speaker A:Like, that's something that's special to her because she.
Speaker A:She just.
Speaker A:She sees it on so many levels with different patients, and so she just has this incredible heart for it.
Speaker A:We have another nurse.
Speaker A:Her name is Summer.
Speaker A:And Summer is just quick.
Speaker A:Like, she is.
Speaker A:Just like.
Speaker A:She's.
Speaker A:She's one who, like, reads the room really fast, except she reads those records really fast.
Speaker A:And she can come in.
Speaker A:She's like, I'm telling you where they're going.
Speaker A:I'm telling you why they took that particular fact and why they're going here.
Speaker A:And it.
Speaker A:I don't think it's any different than, like, a really grid triage nurse.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:So you look at it and you see where you're going.
Speaker A:Her gift is there.
Speaker A:It's amazing to watch her pluck these pieces and then be able to tell a story faster than any of us could.
Speaker A:And she also has this beautiful ability to connect with some of our clients and just say, okay, I want you to know that I hear what you're saying, and anything that I'm looking at, anything that I share with you, doesn't change what happened.
Speaker A:But if you want that time, I'll give it to you.
Speaker A:I just.
Speaker A:I can't sing their praises enough.
Speaker A:We have the best nurse staff.
Speaker C:That's amazing.
Speaker C:I'm absolutely, you know, I'm in awe of what you're doing.
Speaker C:I mean, I come across a lot of lawyers, but I've never come across a firm like you guys that are working.
Speaker C:I think the work that you're doing is absolutely phenomenal.
Speaker C:Before we kind of come to the end of our discussion, I mean, we could keep going on, but before we come to the end of the discussion, how could.
Speaker C:Elliot, what would be the best advice that you would give people now rather than.
Speaker C:Because it seems to be.
Speaker C:There's a lot of.
Speaker C:This is reactive, you should posit, and that things should be proactive from now.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So proactive would be, you know, before someone passes, you know, do you have a life insurance policy?
Speaker A:Where is it, you know, is it through work or is it, you know, a personal policy?
Speaker A:Do we know for certain that the premiums have been paid?
Speaker A:Those are just easy questions to ask.
Speaker A:Now, I will pause and tell you that a lot of times, feathers are ruffled when those questions are asked, because there's a lot of families, and I completely respect this, where they're like, well, that's my stuff.
Speaker A:That's none of your business.
Speaker A:I'm still alive.
Speaker A:You don't get my stuff yet.
Speaker A:And so I feel like it's really important that we acknowledge that, you know, if we're asking these questions.
Speaker A:To preface it with.
Speaker A:I'm not trying to go through your sock drawer.
Speaker A:I just need to know, if something happens to you, where do I go?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And so I would say the most.
Speaker A:One of the greatest gifts a family member can leave is like a roadmap saying, hey, I bank here.
Speaker A:I have this life policy.
Speaker A:It's here.
Speaker A:You can call this person.
Speaker A:A roadmap is.
Speaker A:Is a gift because when somebody passes, you're stressed, you're scared, you're devastated.
Speaker A:A roadmap would be such a comfort at that point.
Speaker C:I think that's amazing.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:And I would say anybody out there that knows from the work that I do in grief, that I would recommend that you have some kind of roadmap, because I've seen more suffering come from the unknown rather than the known.
Speaker A:Yep.
Speaker A:And then I would say, when someone does pass, one of the most important things you can do is a lot of people submit their own claims.
Speaker A:But the minute that they get a pushback, the minute that there's a push for more or we're not sure about this, or things are being delayed at that point, get help, please.
Speaker A:Don't try to do it on your own.
Speaker A:And it's not just because we want to do that for you, but because what's happening is like, evidentiary trails are being created.
Speaker A:Things are happening that maybe you don't know is happening, and you're setting yourself up where the fight is harder down the road.
Speaker A:And then last bit I would give when somebody passes is when you call the insurance company, a lot of times people will call and ask, you know, hey, is this policy still good, or is it here?
Speaker A:And when they talk to someone on the phone, it's usually like, you know, it's just the representative.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:And their job is very limited.
Speaker A:They can look at the screen and say, well, yes, here's this policy, and, yes, these are the beneficiaries, or, yes, there are beneficiaries.
Speaker A:And then we've had people who are so shocked when later they get a letter or a call saying, wait, we have issues with this.
Speaker A:When you're on the phone, ask with whom you're speaking.
Speaker A:Are you a representative?
Speaker A:Are you a claims examiner?
Speaker A:And if someone calls you out of the blue and starts asking about what happened, and, you know, gosh, you know, you know, how were they feeling right before all this happened?
Speaker A:Do not answer those questions, because they are fishing for information that they can use to deny or delay.
Speaker C:They're looking for a pattern so they can actually say, well, you said this and you denied this.
Speaker C:And I see this, I see this in Dobert.
Speaker C:However, challenges and expert witnesses where they'll say, well, you said this in social media, you said this.
Speaker C:And then you, well, context is not clear.
Speaker C:Go back five minutes, go back 10 minutes exactly and you'll see whatever was said or, you know, that thing.
Speaker C:Stephanie, tell everybody how they can get in touch with you and your firm.
Speaker A:Absolutely.
Speaker A:So our website is lifeclaim.com so you can go there or you can email me at stephanie.prestridgelifeclaim.com and that's probably the easiest ways to catch us.
Speaker A:It would be such a pleasure.
Speaker A:Or we have a Facebook page and an Instagram page, so you can come find us on that as well.
Speaker C:And you'll get the details in the show notes.
Speaker C:So anybody who's listening want to connect with them.
Speaker C:And also you'll find them on Help Lawyer as well.
Speaker C:You'll be able to connect with them there very soon, too.
Speaker C:Stephanie, it's been an absolute pleasure having you on and I'm so glad that we actually covered this subject matter.
Speaker C:I'm looking forward to having you on my other show where we can discuss this morning and the realms of grief.
Speaker C:But I think this is important.
Speaker C:Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining us today on the Legal Oil.
Speaker C:This is real important.
Speaker C:If you're someone out there and you have a loved one who is.
Speaker C:If you're in what I call anticipatory grief, if you're waiting on someone to pass, if you're needing advice or you need to get your ducks in a row, then do it sooner rather than later.
Speaker C:Please reach out to Steffi and her team@lifeclimb.com and connect with them because this can save you so much anxiety, so much worry, so much fear.
Speaker C:It's the best thing that you can do.
Speaker C:And for those of you who are preparing, it could be the best gift and roadmap that you give your family to do this now.
Speaker C:Steffi, thank you for being with me in Legal Oil.
Speaker C:I'm looking forward to having you on again.
Speaker C:And your husband can't wait to meet him.
Speaker C:Ladies and gentlemen, this is Legal Oil brought to you by Help Lawyer.
Speaker C:Please make sure you contact us if you've got any questions or if you want me to direct anything towards Steffi and her husband, then connect with us on Help Lawyer as well.
Speaker C:We'll be back very soon and thank you for joining us today.
Speaker C:God bless.
Speaker B:You've been listening to the Legal Owl where law meets the unseen layers of clarity, leadership and inner alignment.
Speaker B:If this sparks something in you, trust that feeling.
Speaker B:Let it lead you for deeper insights, real conversation and strategic guidance.
Speaker B:Connect through the Help Lawyer Network and subscribe to the show wherever you listen to podcasts.
Speaker B:If you prefer a more private connection, you'll find the path when you're ready.
Speaker B:Until next time, stay present, think deeper and lead wiser.
